I met Ciera when we were in Girl Guides together at the age of 10 years old. We bonded over our love of Harry Potter and making mischief.

As a teenager, I got to know her group of friends, who soon became mine, and we laughed and sung and partied our way through the highs and the lows of school life. We were an eclectic bunch of people, but we cared deeply about one another.

Ciera was a compassionate person with a wicked sense of humour. Her laughter could set us all off. I could always rely upon Ciera to lend a listening ear (or a great book) whenever I needed one. She was also an incredible writer. When we were 14, she sent me a beautiful short story that she'd written, which is something I treasure to this day.

Sadly, Ciera had suffered from mental health problems since she was a teenager. Whilst she was the best at making other people feel better, she was profoundly depressed. Three months ago, I received the devastating news that she had died.

Coming to terms with the fact that Ciera isn't here anymore has been harder than I could ever describe. I shift from grief to acceptance to deep regret on an almost daily basis. I wish there was something that I could have done.

The Lovelock Scarf Knitting Pattern

When Ciera died, I wanted to do something tangible in response. Mental health problems have been an unfortunate theme in my own life, having suffered personally and having also witnessed several friends and family fighting their own serious mental health battles. I felt very sad that Ciera had to go through this. And whilst I knew that I couldn't change what happened to her, I wanted to do something that could potentially help save other lives in the future.

So, that's why I designed the Lovelock scarf. This is my way of saying goodbye to a much-loved friend and fundraise so that others can find hope and help with their own mental illnesses.

All of the proceeds from this pattern will be donated monthly to Harmless, an incredible charity, chosen by Ciera's family, who provide much-needed support for those who struggle with self-harm. The battle against depression and suicidal thoughts is an incredibly difficult one and not one to be fought alone. This charity has helped over 25,000 people who self-harm since they launched in 2007, and with the help of our fundraising, they can continue to do this good work.

Mental Illness Is Serious

When planning to launch this knitting pattern, I asked Ciera's sister, Cassie, whether she would like to share something about Ciera here today. Like her sister, Cassie is a beautiful writer and I'm grateful that she has been able to share this poem with us.

When I used to wake up frightened, 
screaming my lungs out in the middle of the night, 
she would come thundering down the corridor.
She would sit with me on the
edge
of my bed until I fell asleep again. 
Now no-one is there in the middle of the night.
Not for me and not for you. 

Mental illness is extremely serious and it affects more of us than you can possibly imagine. This is why we need to support charities, like Harmless, who support their clients on their journey through treatment into recovery.

I like to think of the Lovelock scarf as a hug to someone who needs it: a physical act of wrapping yourself or someone you care about in love. By purchasing this scarf pattern, not only will you be able to knit something comforting and beautiful for yourself (knitting is most definitely self-care, don't you agree?) but you will also be helping Harmless to provide comfort to those who desperately need it.

I hope you will join me in supporting the work of this amazing charity by purchasing this pattern today.